


man-made

by Anonymous



Category: Hockey RPF, Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: ? - Freeform, Angst, M/M, Robots, listen, quasi crack, this is just...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 22:24:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17816633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Patrice had done something- he didn’t catch it- and it was as if the front of his stomach swung forward like a door. Where his abdomen was, or would be, there was instead a thick tangle of various primary colored wires.





	man-made

**CONFIDENTAL**

**STATEMENT OF PURCHASE**

PROTOTYPE MODEL: CLEAR-E37  
“PATRICE”  
ARTIFICIALLY INTELLIGENT ANDROID CREATED BY [REDACTED] CO.  
SERIAL NO. 397852-2834

ORDERED BY [REDACTED] FOR USE BY THE BOSTON BRUINS ORGANIZATION™  
5 FEBRUARY 2003  
DELIVERY DATE: 21 JUNE 2003

PAYMENT DUE: [REDACTED] (REDUCED PRICE FOR PROTOTYPE MODEL)  
PAYMENT RECEIVED: 19 JUNE 2003

LIFETIME WARRANTY*

**FEATURES**

 **HEIGHT** : APPROXIMATELY 186 CM

**WEIGHT** : APPROXIMATELY 85 KG

**SENSORS** : LIGHT, PROXIMITY, SOUND, CONTACT, TEMPERATURE, PRESSURE, TILT, & GYROSCOPE. FACIAL RECOGNITION AND EMOTIONAL INTERPRETATION. 

**ACTUATOR** : SERVO MOTOR

**POWER** : INTERNAL DC POWER RESOURCE

**CPU** : ONE MICROCONTROLLER (Core i9-7980XE 4.5GHz) IS EMBEDDED. AN EXTERNAL PC CAN BE USED FOR OPTIONAL REMOTE CONTROL.

**EXTERIOR MATERIAL** : RealFeel™ SYNTHETIC SKIN

**AI** : MODEL CLEAR-E37 IS FULLY AUTONOMOUS, BUT CAN BE REPROGRAMMED. UPLOADED WITH ENGLISH AND FRENCH LANGUAGE CAPABILITIES.

00110011 00110111

“He needs to be better. Period.”

Brad stopped up short where he was walking leisurely down a side hallway after practice at the sound of Coach Julien’s voice. He was later than usual leaving the rink, caught up talking with his teammates and enjoying the feeling of not having much else to do that day. His bare feet must’ve not made enough sound to interrupt a what seemed to be a rather heated conversation that was happening within Claude’s office behind a cracked door. Surely they weren’t talking about him? 

“Understood, but-”

“No. No more excuses. You told me he would be the best. The _best_.”

Okay, so they weren’t talking about him. That was definitely Claude, but he didn’t recognize the voice he was talking to. 

“Sir, you have to understand there’s a human element to this. He can only be as good as his teammates allow him to-”

“I don’t care. I don’t care what you have to do. Do some different programming, hell, re-wire him for all I care.”

“I’m just trying to make sure you have realistic expectations. Sir.”

There was a long pause. 

“I’d better see some improvements by next week.” Claude cleared his throat, and Brad could see his shadow appear on the opposite wall as he neared the door.

He turned and hurried away. 

The conversation was a little odd, but Brad didn’t give it a second thought until the next week.

00110011 00110111

“Nice shot!” Brad cheered in Patrice’s general direction as he flew around the back of the net. They’d just dashed on the ice for practice, and he wondered if the feeling of skating on fresh ice would ever get old. Patrice had just made a nice top left corner shot that Tuukka didn’t even see.

That was the thing about Bergy- Brad wondered just how good he’d be if his teammates were on the same level as him. Every pass, every shot, even the way he skated- it was nearly perfect. It was just his teammates who sometimes unknowingly thwarted his otherwise flawless play. 

Brad stopped by the bench for another quick sip of water, and Patrice appeared by his side shortly after. “Thanks, man,” he said with a smile. 

Patrice looked at him fondly, and Brad felt his heart swoop. He leaned in as if he were sharing with Brad some secret. “Claude hasn’t been too happy with me lately. But I spent some time this weekend, you know, recharging, and I’m feeling a lot better.” 

Wait, so Claude had been talking about _Patrice_? To whom?

“Oh, that’s great, man. You can tell, you’ve been on fire today.” Brad offered in response, scraping one skate blade back and forth where he stood. He felt too old to be having what could only be described as a crush, but here he was. Trying not to blush every time Patrice would give him the time of day, every touch lighting him up like his spine was a live wire.

00110011 00110111

“Listen, I know something’s up with you. You’re been acting weird lately. What’s been going on?” Torey asked Brad from the drivers seat of his car, keeping his tone casual.

There was no point in lying, Torey was his best friend. He may as well get this off of his chest. 

Brad wrung his hands in his lap nervously before finally speaking. “Well.” He wasn’t sure if he could say it.

Torey pushed a hand through his hair. “I mean, you don’t _have_ to tell me. But just know that I’m here for you.”

“No! No, it’s not that. I mean, I want to tell you. It’s just that it’d be weird for me to say out loud.” Brad laughed nervously.

Humming in consideration, Torey drummed on the steering wheel. “Would it make you feel better or worse if I said I might already have an idea about what this is all about?”

“IhavefeelingsforBergy.” Brad said, all one word. 

“Okay, yeah, I kinda figured,” Torey chuckled. He was obviously not finding this as earth-shattering as Brad was. 

“Oh shit. Fuck. How did you know?! Am I that obvious?” Brad pushed his face back into the headrest with his palms as dramatically as possible. Truly, this was the end of the world. 

“I mean, he handed you a cup of tea the other day and you kissed him on the cheek. So. I mean.” 

“You saw that?”

“Yeah, Zee and I were standing _right there_.”

Brad sputtered, throwing his hands up in defeat while Torey continued cackling. 

“I didn’t _mean_ to! I just kiss cheeks sometimes! Like, we kiss cheeks in my family, okay! It wasn’t a conscious decision!” 

Torey reached over and patted his kneecap. “Shhhh. My guy. It’s okay. Bergy was literally so fine with it. He was smiling and everything. It’s not that big of a deal.” 

“But what am I going to do?” Brad started opening and closing the glove compartment compulsively until Torey slammed it shut one final time. 

“Just tell him. I think he’s into you. And if not, you know how he is.” he made a vague motion with one hand while the other turned the car onto the exit ramp. “It’ll be fine. He’s a great guy.”

“Torey.” Brad paused to collect his thoughts. “That’s the thing though. He’s such a great guy. I feel like I’m too… whatever to feel this way, but like… I don’t even know how to describe it. I love being with him. He’s so perfect. It’s like I’m sixteen again or some dumb shit like that.”

“Uhh yeah, dude. It’s called like, being in love.” Torey cracked a smile, and shoved Brad’s shoulder until he did too.

00110011 00110111

Brad rapped his knuckles against Patrice’s hotel room door gently. Four quick taps, barely enough to make a sound.

“Well, guess he went to sleep,” Brad said under his breath, already chickening out. Before he could even turn away, however, there was Bergy, who opened the door with a smile. He ushered him in before Brad could even stutter out a lame excuse for coming to see him. 

There was no point in drawing it out. This whole thing had already been drawn out long enough. 

 

“What’s going on?” Patrice asked, in a tone that said he was ready to help. It was almost midnight, but he was still completely dressed. He looked like he was ready to go for the morning, in fact, which was kind of weird but, whatever. Patrice was just Patrice. 

Brad took a deep breath and grabbed the metaphorical bull that was his stupidly life consuming infatuation by the horns. “I can’t keep it to myself anymore, not with the chance that you might feel the same way, I guess. I mean, I really care about you. Is what I’m saying.” 

Patrice reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. “I care about you too, Marchy. Thank you for telling me.”

Of fucking course Bergy wouldn’t get what he meant. 

“No, I mean I have _feelings_ for you. Like, I want to take you on a date. Or something like that.” Jesus, why would he say ‘or something like that’? Now Patrice will think he just wants to fuck, and although that isn’t necessarily wrong that’s still not his intended meaning, why can’t he just say what he actually-

“I see. And lots of things make sense now,” Patrice said, nodding. “I wish that I could love you the same way that you love me. You’re a great guy.”

There it was. Brad felt his face burn in embarrassment. He hadn’t said anything about love. He must really be that obvious. “I get it. It’s fine.” He turned to let himself back out of Patrice’s room.

“Wait!” Patrice grabbed his hand and pulled him close. “You deserve to know the truth. I’ve been advised to not tell anyone this except for in certain circumstances, and I just feel like you should know. And I’m sorry.”

“Tell anyone what?” What, was he sick or something? 

Patrice started quickly unbuttoning his shirt from the bottom-up, and Brad found himself speechless for maybe the second time in his life. Patrice looked up from his work to see Brad gawking at him. “Oh, I’m not human. But I know you won’t believe me.”

“What?” 

_What?_

“Listen, Bergy, if you don’t feel the same way that’s okay, but there’s no reason to make up some kind of _oh my fucking god._ ”

Patrice had done something- he didn’t catch it- and it was as if the front of his stomach swung forward like a door. Where his abdomen was, or would be, there was instead a thick tangle of various primary colored wires. 

“I’m an android. They made me for the team. I always wanted to tell you, just because… I don’t know. Only Zee and management knows.” 

This was the worst prank that had ever been played. Ever. 

“I hate you. I fucking hate you so much. Did Torey put you up to this?” Brad laughed, a harsh, bitter sound. “I bet you two really thought this was a laugh, huh. Really? You couldn’t have just let me down easy and then laughed about it on your own later? I-”

“No, please, I’m only telling you because I know if I was a human, I would feel the same way. You are-”

“Cut the bull, Bergeron.” He looked so stupid in Brad’s eyes, just standing there with his shirt rucked up over that weird prosthesis or whatever it was, face halfway pleading, halfway just pathetic. “Take this shit off.” Brad reached out and grabbed the wires and yanked, expecting the whole panel to pop off like a Halloween costume accessory. 

He didn’t expect a huge bundle of them to tear out with a horrible ripping sound. 

Patrice’s knees buckled, and he collapsed to the floor.

00110011 00110111

**Bergeron injured, Marchand released from contract**

**BOSTON-** Boston Bruins general manager Don Sweeney announced on Tuesday morning that center Patrice Bergeron will be out indefinitely with an unspecified lower-body injury.

“We are not going to disclose any further details at this time. I do not know if he will return this season or not,” said Sweeney.

He additionally disclosed that winger Brad Marchand has been put on unconditional waivers for the purpose of terminating his contract. 

“There had been some internal issues going on, and we decided that this was the best course of action to be taken. I will not be taking any questions, and again, there are no further details to be disclosed at this time.”

**Author's Note:**

> i dont know what this was either okay i realize this is not my best work but! i finished it
> 
> anyway i swear i have one in the works that is 100% fluff please dont worry about me lmao
> 
> the working title for this was 'the robotics team jumped out'
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr [@fridgefishwrites](https://fridgefishwrites.tumblr.com)


End file.
